
I often hear of subs who have been commanded by their Dominant to shut out their friends, exclude themselves from any previous support network and focus on the Dominant entirely. While I can see the BDSM play within this, I can also see many dangers for BOTH parties involved.
Miss Melody Grace puts it so well when she says
” As someone who is greatly concerned with the safety of both subs and Doms, I find it very disturbing that anyone would step away from any support network because of a new relationship …. this lifestyle is amazing but also we need to be aware of dangers … subs but also Doms need to have plenty of people aware of their relationship so if any problems do arise both people have someone to turn to. Being submissive does not mean that once you find your perfect Master you do not need the support of other subs and Doms; and Doms also because of the games they play, need to know they have people on their side and understand them if it is needed” (quote taken from the Frustrating Orgasm Denial group on Facebook).
There is another reason that others should be aware of the consensual nature of the relationship on BOTH sides, if something were to go wrong with the relationship would either of you really want to be open to accusations of abuse? This is more important for the Dominant partner to be honest, and those are often the ones who feel that support is a sign of weakness!
I actively encourage my playthings to have a support network that is seperate from Me. I know that this way if they are too nervous or fearful to raise something with Me they can obtain support from others and gain the confidence to talk to Me (or get someone else to do their dirty work and speak to Me for them! LOL!).
ANY relationship where you are expected to alienate those you already know and love isn’t healthy a one. It displays a clear insecurity in the person who is making that demand, and if that person is a “dominant” then questions should be raised about where
their authority comes from. If they need to negate your previous life [which has helped to form you], then are they really dominant enough to deal with
you?
Sanely
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